GM Confirms Car & Driver’s “Pontiac Is Back” Ad Was A Spoof

Back in the 1960s and ’70s Car and Driver magazine ruffled plenty of feathers with articles about the original coast-to-coast Cannonball Run (featuring a Porsche 911 and Pontiac Trans Am at the Red Ball garage starting line on the cover) and a comparison between Ferrari’s GTO and Pontiac’s model of the same name. And 16 years after Pontiac was axed, the brand is still causing controversy in C/D’s pages.

The controversy stems from what appears to be a Pontiac advert on the inside back cover of the latest issue of the magazine heralding the return of the brand GM axed in 2009. We say “appears to be” but you’d have to be both hard of seeing and thinking to consider it anything other than a bit of fun. But it seems some people are taking it seriously.

Related: This Pontiac GTO 4-Door Pickup Mashup Offers Something For Everyone

“Pontiac fans, it’s been a weird 15 years since we left, hasn’t it?” the opening text asks. “Now, we can’t definitely say that Pontiac’s absence influenced the events we all have been through, but c’mon. Caffeine comes out of Four Loko, and now it’s in lemonade? Everything on the road looks like an Aztek now?”

“You need us. America needs us. The future needs us. So Pontiac is back.”

So far, it’s aaaalllllmost credible. But then the copywriter’s tongue buries itself firmly into his cheek.

“Our first model is a hybrid. Surprised? Well, it uses a battery and an electric motor to start a 667-hp [676 PS] supercharged 372-cubic-inch [6.1 liters] V-8. And we think you’re going to want one, because what else are you going to do? You can’t buy a new Dodge Challenger and leave the splitter guards on anymore. Don’t worry, we’ve got you—our new car’s entire front end is a splitter guard.“

“At Pontiac, we’re here to offer a future filled with V-8s, great sounds, gold pinstripes, and window louvers. And if someone shouts ‘Last call,’ we’ll just smuggle in some Coors from Colorado and keep the party going.”

Despite the ‘hybrid’ part of the powertrain clearly being no more than just a regular battery and electric starter, and a prominent disclaimer at the foot of the page reading “Do you need to be told that this advertisement is fake and not to be taken seriously? Our lawyers think you do,” there are car people on the internet that really think there might be some truth in it. You know why? Because they want it to to be true. Wasn’t life much better in the old days?

Ah, The Good Old Days

Hmm. Maybe, maybe not. People miss Pontiac in the way they miss old girlfriends. They remember the good bits and conveniently forget about the bad. They dream about tri-power GTOs, Super-Duty Firebirds and 20th Anniversary Turbo Trans Ams that could smoke supercars. They conveniently don’t dream about junk like the 53 hp (53 PS) T1000, the disappointingly bland 2000s GTO reboot and, yes, the hideous Aztec, though the advert does note how well the mutant SUV anticipated modern trends like crossover packaging and split headlights.

When contacted for its opinion on the “ad” GM must have been too busy rolling its eyes and refused to flat out deny the rebirth rumors, only saying it had “no comment” to make.

Presuming you’re not the kind of conspiracy theory-loving nut that thinks there’s some hidden message about a true Pontiac rebirth contained in the advert, do you think GM should resurrect the brand, and which current GM vehicles are ripe for a Pontiac makeover?

Or do you think it really is coming back? Leave a comment and let us know.